We are apparently never going to give him up.

"Fuck these bitches," screams Britney, each word ringing out between sobs. "These idiots can't do anything right!"

Oh my jesus.

Question asks for appeal of Woz; Woz busy MeFi account and responds. BEST ASK MEFI EVER, hands down.

An argument as to why Zach Braff is more of an aggregator than a great actor.

Oh, that Earl.

Hasslehoff gets his hands on a GSA. Amazing.

Now he's full-time faculty, and his netid is kind of listed...uh oh.

Phil mentions his inability to get more than 15 feet in the door at TARcon 9.

Former anecdote turns into full blown hilarious video. Truly amazing.

"The film grossed a paltry $17 million, which would be good for any non-Tom-Cruise-type movie star. But, being who he is, that number looks like the filling in a very large poo sandwich."

Michael Cera talks Weezer, Arrested, and pies. Delicious pies.

What a fucking hypocrite.

Keifer gets drunk as shit, breakdances, destroys terrorist christmas tree. Amazing.

"Former Family Ties star Justine Bateman has signed on to guest star opposite baby brother Jason on what could be one of the final episodes of the Emmy-winning sitcom."

Ricky Gervais gets the award for the BIGGEST ZING EVER.

By Michael Ian Black.

"Jerry Siegel and Joe Schuster once saw Vin Diesel punch a building in the face, and then powerbomb it onto the sidewalk. This inspired them to create Superman."

"Life on a Stick looks fucking hilarious!! I bet I would laugh anywhere from one to two times during its entire run! They’ve really captured what its like to be a 2 dimensional character that has zero basis in reality although it purports to be!"

You the duck, Gary!

"Pop superstar Britney Spears has offered some unusual advice to the beleaguered Michael Jackson – he should get drunk and fight someone in a bar."

:(

Includes prank calls. Heh.

"If you sat with my colleagues, after lunch, you would just be beaten beyond recognition."

Two great comedic tastes that taste great together.

Interview with the creators of Avenue Q

Linnell covers all the songs he only started liking after repeated exposure. Surprisingly frank playlist.

Life Aquatic opens in NYC on Friday.

TheJohnCleese.com is the new DavidLynch.com; $50/yr for content. [via mom]

At one moment, for example, he pointed to an expensive bracelet on his wrist and yelled at the lieutenant in charge, "One year, right here. One year, right here," clearly implying that it cost more than the lieutenant's salary.

"Some people, well, if they don't like Scientology, well, then, fuck you." He rises from the table. "Really." He points an angry finger at the imaginary enemy. "Fuck you." His face reddens. "Period."

"...DMX and Hudgins were charged with attempted robbery, criminal impersonation and criminal mischief. A law enforcement source said DMX would also be charged with driving under the influence of drugs or alcohol."