Moneyquote: "Sobriety, laudable in many respects, does imply rigidity of thought. The best presidents were open-minded, and generally open to a drink. The nondrinkers, at least over the last century or so, were terrible presidents."

Roger Ebert was right. Jackasses shouldn't drink and drive. Better luck, next time. Oh wait, there won't be a next time.

iPhone optimized for obvious reasons.