Enter an English phrase, watch it being translated into Japanese, then back to English until the app decides it's reached 'equilibrium' (I'm not entirely sure what that means - some translation-translations go on for ages, some only get a couple of passes).

Wrong. Mic. (or mike), miking and miked.

Enter a long word, get a shorter synonym. You know, for Twitter.

Subs occasionally, er, desubjunctivise my sentences. It annoys me even more than the removal of semicolons.

You can set the spellchecker dictionary to proper English. I cannot sodding believe I didn't know this before.

A lively young damsel named Menzies Inquired: "Do you know what this thenzies?" Her aunt, with a gasp, Replied: "It's a wasp, And you're holding the end where the stenzies.