If ever a people deserved tasering, it’s Holmeses.

Dr. John Sheppard was not as excited about joining the project as Rodney was to have him on board.

The problem with teaching someone with a deeply vindictive personality Occlumency was the inevitable problem of his using it to evil ends; or. Remus Lupin, Sultan's Pleasure Boy.

"I'm not the one who's been divorced three times," Tony pouts.

There's an entire population of people in Tony's neighborhood that think he's married.

Sandaime never had to put up with any of this crap.
[Naruto/Gaara]

The original plan for returning to England involved fucking around being shellshocked and suffering mandatory post-combat counseling and physical therapy to dissect the shattered mosaic of his feelings. That's not quite how it goes.

"Okay, I've suddenly developed the ability to see the future, Jim," Leonard says, "And I know that in ten seconds I'm going to regret asking this question. But what are they volunteering for, exactly?"

Jim's grin gets bigger and more perverted, which hey, Leonard hadn't even thought was possible. "For the wiki project, Leonard. Gaila and I decided to put together a database for Starfleet cadets about sexual practices of all available species, as well as inter-species compatibility."

(Supernatural) ( Wherein the peanut gallery and I were sitting around during my work hours talking about terrible romantic comedies, and I said, lol, wouldn't it be funny if someone wrote Dean/Castiel to The Wedding Date? and there was a prophetic silence and then some stuff happened and I got all turned around and somehow this had happened. [complete]

Gibbs sometimes wonders what he did to deserve these morons, but then he looks through the one-way window at three naked and extremely uncomfortable-looking Marines and figures it could be worse.

(Supernatural) ( Wherein the peanut gallery and I were sitting around during my work hours talking about terrible romantic comedies, and I said, lol, wouldn't it be funny if someone wrote Dean/Castiel to The Wedding Date? and there was a prophetic silence and then some stuff happened and I got all turned around and somehow this had happened. )

"Merlin," Arthur says, barely looking up from the stack of documents on his desk, "come here, please."

Arthur imagines there are people less fit to serve, but he’s never met any. He doesn’t know why he continues to endure Merlin’s hamfisted attempts, but there is something dear and endearing underneath, and Arthur is well aware of the weak nature of his mother’s soft heart, beating frantically underneath the iron cage of the armor his father had given him.

Arthur was wearing black swimming trunks, a bit shorter and tighter than Merlin was altogether comfortable with, aviator shades, and the sun had dotted a handful of freckles across his nose and high over his cheeks that Merlin had found irresistible so far. And under the Mediterranean light, Arthur had shed his paleness from a long winter of buttoned-up aristocracy. His hair nearly glimmered now, bleached out, and his chest and broad shoulders were gold, so yeah, Merlin imagined Arthur might find someone with which to amuse himself. It would, of course, end only in tragedy, as Merlin might not know what to do with his bit of magic, but he knew enough to know that he could leave a wake of dead, oily-haired Italian twinks in his warpath.

In which Prince Arthur meets Merlin and all hell promptly breaks lose.

There are noises in the cosmic grapevine about three women in Savannah, about prophesy and oracle and older gods than even they know the words for, and Dean hears about it from a waitress at the counter of a diner off the side of a North Carolina freeway.

| R | "I've been watching a lot of CSI," John says, eyes crazy.

| PG-13 | It's rough being Team 7.

Instead, he got punks writing poorly-punctuated RateMyProfessor reviews dedicated to blatant character defamation and the occasional fake Livejournal account created by an especially-bitter student. He didn't know whether to be concerned for his safety or terribly flattered that somebody had taken the time to create a fake mad diary for him, complete with musical selections from Whitesnake and Prince and moods reading: wrathful, extra wrathful, wrathful to the power of the largest known prime. It was all, admittedly, entertaining--at least until John had dropped into the seat opposite Rodney at Caribou one afternoon and asked, "So tell me: this GaySugarDaddy.com service. How is that working for you?"

The day the McKays moved into Eureka Jack got approximately a dozen phone calls from Fargo, who was hiding under a desk in his office at Global Dynamics.

"If I'm vice president, who's going to bail you out when you end up in jail? This isn't like that time you dragged us both onto student council at the hall, Bruno, this is serious. The President is in charge of the entire student budget!"

PG | On Wednesday, Doumeki had a bento box with flowers on it.

After he hacks Sheppard's computer and sets him up with the most appropriate chat handle ever, Rodney manages to hold out for almost an entire day before he calls the SGC.

R | In which Clark is a not-so-mild-mannered reporter, Lex is a biological fugitive, and someone is mold.

Boots really should have drowned Edward in the bathtub when he'd had the chance back when he was in the fifth grade and Edward was not very large or very fast.

Mcshep, SGA/Eureka crossover. This is a deeply awesome and perfect crossover, and a hysterically funny story series.

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