Tiffany was beginning to regret ever asking Nanny Ogg to be involved in preparations for her impending marriage to Preston.

... what had started out as the rather hazy memory of a nice little pub somewhere near Hoxton has taken a turn for the totally bizarre.

The door to the bar had suddenly burst open, and there had been this tide of small blue things, which had swept in and up over the counter, hitting the bottles like a tide of thirsty, violent, heavily-tattooed locusts.

It's a terrible thing to be nearly sixteen and the wrong species. What if his species wasn't the only thing Carrot was wrong about?

Agnes has been in Uberwald for years. It's time something changed.

Humble bumble
Roil and tumble
Giants howl
And dragons grumble

Even when she was six, Tiffany Aching had known the rhyme was silly. So she forgot it.

This was, on later reflection, probably a mistake.

Disc Fest: a Discworld Fic and Art Fest (gen, het, and slash) which will be open for sign-ups in May 2011.

Death of Rats plushies!

Appears to be a flourishing city with a substantial underground subsection. Law enforcement appears to be wildly scattered and scarce. Do not foresee any immediate problems with expanding operations into Ankh-Morpork

Somewhere along the line, without even meaning to, Sam Vimes had acquired a hobby.

Adora Belle is arrested, Lady Sybil is there to help, or at least there to make the tea.

The world had not changed. Awf'ly Wee Billy Bigchin Mac Feegle felt it in the earth, smelled it in the air, which had the familiar scent of turf, wildflowers, and wet sheep. Yet some things were different since the Feegles had returned to their mound on the Chalk.

Characters/Pairings: Maladicta/Polly
Summary: This is new.
Notes: For Porn Battle X, prompt "Maladicta/Polly: hands, skin, sharp" Smut, fangplay. 1123 words.

Two Senior Librarians have tea. The Ministry tries to interfere. Set during Harry's fifth year.

The Restricted Section of the Library of Unseen University is, primarily, a holding pen for books too dangerous to read.

Pictures related to the North American Discworld Convention 2009

Prompt: Discworld, any character, A gay wizard attempts to determine whether Unseen University's celibacy policy applies to him...and if so, why?
Summary: At age thirteen, Hubert Greenish knew for certain that he was destined to be a wizard.
Warnings: Original characters, circuitous discussion of sexual practice, and cabbages.

Rating: PG-13
Warnings: deathbed fic
Prompt/challenge you're answering: "Granny Weatherwax and Sydney: there's no need to complicate / our time is short / this is our fate, I'm yours"

"Pardon me," said Vetinari. "I hate to interrupt you while you're working, but I'm a big fan, and I wondered if I could get your autograph."

I'M FLATTERED, said Death as he tucked away his scythe. He patted his robe in search of a pen.
[DEATH/Vetinari]

One of Drumknott's filing systems may be in need of some revision.

Daniel Jackson has come back from the dead too many times, and that has consequences. Like attracting the attention of Auditors...

Ptraci doesn't mind a political marriage for the sake of Djelibeybi's succession, but she doesn't understand why everyone seems to balk at the idea of the queen taking handmaidens to bed; after all, no one minded the *king* doing it, and she's doing the same job.

Prompt: Discworld, any character, The ongoing changes in dwarven views on gender and sexuality have any number of repercussions. How many young dwarves are "coming out" as the gender they weren't born as? Conversely, is all this openness actually eroding dwarven freedom to view themselves however, and marry whomever, they wish?
Summary: It's amazing how the world rarely gets less complicated.

"She will be a librarian, that one. If the war spares her. If the war spares any of them. And the books know her touch, respond to her presence, are calmer for her passing by them (not at night, though. Not any more.)"

Vimes learns something about dwarfs. Carrot doesn’t really learn anything helpful about humans. This is par for the course, really.

John really did have Lancre in his blood. For some people, that alone was proof enough that he belonged to them.

Ooook Ook EEEK Oo-ook, Or: The Necessity of not being an Orang-Utan
rack. Mountains of crack.
Notes: [info]anatsuno wanted "the story where Rodney's the Librarian from Discworld. going Ook!

The next few times were along the same lines. Jack was becoming used to the idea that he couldn't die. However, being met by the Grim Reaper each time (who just stood there in silence until whatever it was kicked in and Jack came back to life) was really very creepy. It had taken the first few goes to accept that it was the Grim Reaper standing there, but there was only so long that Jack could ignore the scythe.

Harry Potter and Edward Cullen walk into a bar.

Myfanwy lay listlessly across his knees. Her temperature was up something crazy even for a reptile: one couldn't even stand to touch her with bare hands for more than a few seconds.