I need to follow this person on Tumblr. Immediately.

WOAH AMAZING KIRK REMIX OF THE CLASSIC SPOCK FANVID.

In which Jim shows Spock a good first time, or maybe it's Spock who shows Jim. Cisgirl!Spock was kind of awesome in this.

In which Kirk has some surprises hidden in his genetic heritage. HAHAHA, THIS WAS AWESOME.

In which they woo each other with poetry and life-threatening missions and Vulcan touch telepathy. This was the most perfect thing in all existence. And I mean that in a BONES OMG and a CHEKOV HAHA and a SPOCK TEEHEE and a JIM AWWWWWW and a KIRK/SPOCK EEEEEEE way. Perfection in a deeply hilarious, wonderfully warm cup.

In which Kirk and Spock spend Valentine's Day both traditionally (in love) and unconventionally (Spock is comatose, lol).

In which there's an AU where Spock and Kirk have to room together as cadets and Kirk wins Spock over with Christmas cheer. OH MY GOD IT'S SO LOVELY AND ADORABLE AND CHEEKY AND CHRISTMASY, I CANNOT EVEN. I MUST EEEEEEEE.

In which Spock has a prehensile cock and the Enterprise's crew are quite the little lateral thinkers. I just. Only fandom, guys. Actually, this was really, really funny (and kind of interesting??), in addition to being eight kinds of horrifying.

In which The Young Victoria and Star Trek XI are married together in one beautiful, crazy, clusterfuck of a fanfic. Royalty AU of great word count and awesomeness.

In which Spock unexpectedly gets a lapful of sleepy stranger on the bus one evening. Awwww, adorable.

In which Kirk makes the fatshirt look fiiiiine, and she uses it to torture Spock into having sex with her, but then things develop a bit more than she was quite expecting. Hahaha, this was just obscenely funny, and sometimes just plain obscene, but always kind of insane and kind of awesome.

In which Jim makes the ingenious connection between henna and Vulcan hand sensitivity. Moohaha.

Really, really compelling meta commentary for a really, really compelling vid. It doesn't really hit its stride until it gets to the verse by verse commentary, but when it gets there, it is ON.

In which the Enterprise is Earth-bound for a mind-numbing diplomatic summit of some kind, and Kirk and Spock decide to make it interesting by playing sex chicken as only Kirk and Spock can play it. THIS. WAS. AMAZING. And the rather miraculous thing about it was that my favorite part was not Kirk and Spock passing notes like the 14 year-olds they are for each other, but instead was UHURA BEING THE PLATONIC LOVE OF JIM'S LIFE, BECAUSE YES. I love it when Uhura gets to be the badass she is! "You are the sunshine of my life!" DEAD. Overall, A FUCKING PLUS.

In which Spock learns about ballroom dancing and other aspects of humanity when he and his parents visit an Earth resort where Jim Kirk works as a dancer. DIRTY DANCING AU OMG FOR THE WIN. This was actually an extremely intelligent fic that expertly incorporated the themes of the movie--i.e. the importance of making peace with yourself and pursuing happiness over propriety and expectations. Buttloads of dancing UST and touch telepathy and other sexy shenanigans made this fic a pleasure as well as a privilege to read.

Kirk/Spock AU picspam with Spock as a Catholic priest and Kirk as his unholy temptation! My longstanding Catholic guilt caused me to not enjoy this quite as much as I could have, but it was still pretty epically hilarious even with my misgivings.

In which aliens make them do it. THIS. IS. THE. FUNNIEST THING. EVER. Basically, there is not much actual sex, it is mostly just the entire crew reacting to an aliens-make-them-do-it situation. And they react in unutterably hilarious ways. I don't have words. Which contains the lines:

Jim looks at Spock. Spock looks at Jim. "A captain and his first officer have a special relationship," says Jim solemnly, and points him toward the waiting researchers.

"That was less comforting than I assume you intended, sir," says Spock. "Dr McCoy, for someone who is as obsessed as you with germs, you seem very fond of lying in the dirt and weeping."

WHAT THE HELL IS THIS CELINE FUCKING DION SONG DOING IN A START TREK VID? (THE ANSWER: BEING EPIC) (P.S. Now I'm going to have to go sing this song dramatically into the mirror in order to purge the epicness from my system. THANKS, YOUTUBE. D:)

In which someone is sending Spock anonymous love notes in the week leading up the Valentine's Day. I LOVED THIS, HAHAHA. The notes are so awesomely lame--perfectly designed to perplex Spock and amuse the reader (no doubt Jim as well).

D'aaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.

Prettyful.

DARCY!SPOCK DARCY!SPOCK DARCY!SPOCK DARCY!SPOCK DARCY!SPOCK DARCY!SPOCK DARCY!SPOCK DARCY!SPOCK DARCY!SPOCK DARCY!SPOCK DARCY!SPOCK DARCY!SPOCK DARCY!SPOCK DARCY!SPOCK DARCY!SPOCK OMGGGGGGGG, HOT.

Woah. The vid equivalent of those fics where there's unintentional memory transference due to the mind-meld. This was amazingly clever.

In which they acquire Kirk!Prime, who does some serious liplocking with Spock!Prime, and the only thing that bothers Jim is that he apparently acquired some paunch in the other universe. Hahahahahaha.

In which Spock betrays his love with logic! Adorable!

In which Spock and Kirk cloud-watch. Ugh, dead of fluff, in the best way possible.

In which Jim has learned a lot of strange lessons over the years, some good and some not so. Waaaaaaaah, this was so good, I kind of can't take it. Also, extra points for Spock's alien anatomy actually affecting their sexual practices.

In which Kirk gets turned into a dog and STILL manages to save the day and get the gir--get the Spock in the end! Hahaha, doggy POVs are awesome.

Kirk and his baby with Spock. Whatever, Kirk+kids = adorable.

In which the crew think Jim and Spock are trying to kill each other, and that is obviously not what's happening. HahaHA.

HAHAHA, STRIP 3D CHESS. Also, ickle!Kirk/Spock! *pinches their cheeks*

In which people are always trying to make Spock bottom. I didn't really care for the +1, but the 5 times were all pretty good.

In which Kirk is in a charity auction and the two Spocks start a bidding war over him. Short and sweet and hilarious. >XD

In which we see the continuation of the Kirk-goes-to-Vulcan-as-a-kid verse at the academy, through Uhura's eyes. Awww, they're so cute and co-dependent!

In which we see a page out of Jim's Captain's Log... if Jim's Captain's Log was written by a smitten 13 year-old girl. Bwahahaha.

1. In which Kirk decides to tell Spock to move in, and is nervous and adorable about it. 2. In which Kirk goes to Vulcan as a kid, and things take quite a few new turns. Both of these were awesome, but ickle!Kirk/Spock was particularly delightful.

In which Kirk is the Dempsey to Spock's Giselle. I wish I were making that up, but it's actually adorable and kind of works for them.

In which Kirk's a girl who's turned tricks on the streets of San Fransisco and Spock is this interesting, strange, challenging not-quite-client who she can't seem to shake. LOVE. How fucking awesome was this? So fucking awesome!

In which Spock keeps getting hit on by random aliens, and Kirk is not too happy about it. Cute and hilarious! Poor Spock. Poor Kirk. lololol

In which Jim read too many of his mother's romance novels as a kid, and Spock's saliva has strange properties. Hahaha, what the hell.

In which there are the continued adventures of Jim and Spock at Grandma Grayson's house. I love this woman, hahahahaha.

In which Kirk meets Spock's human grandmother. And we see that some things about Spock are bred long back into the Grayson line. Oh my fucking God, she calls him Spockie and gets away with it! Awesome!

In which there was more to that mind meld than Jim remembers, and it starts to affect his daily life. This was really cool, and the frenetic pace and style fit the story really well.

In which the Enterprise celebrates a host of cultural practices during the holidays and Kirk tries to respect all of them, and a certain Vulcan's in particular. THIS. WAS SO. CUTE. I am dead from holiday cheer. This was just so lovely, and Bones was so funny, and Spock totally pwned Kirk at the end like the boss that he is, amazing amazing awesome.

In which Kirk grows up too fast, but he learns some important things along the way. Some of these didn't fit well enough for me, but what the hell right? Some of them were great.

In which Kirk deals with self-doubt in his newfound captaincy and his residual mindmeld slash growing personal feelings for Spock. Which contains the line: "This was supposed to be his soulmate? His one true love? His tra-la-la, or whatever that word was that the other Spock and the other him had called each other in the various images and feelings he had glimpsed in the other Spock’s mind? It was incomprehensible." TRA-LA-LA!!! BRB LOLING FOREVER. Actually, this fic was kind of serious in a hurts so good, h/c kind of way.

In which Kirk is about inches away from causing an interplanetary incident. Over not marrying Spock. Hahaha, this was fun.

In which Uhura kicks Kirk's ass about his unpursued crush on Spock. There were some truly, truly golden moments in this fic.

In which Kirk uses sex with Spock as a kind of bonding experience for stress-relief, but of course there is something more there than either of them really realizes. Which contains the line: "Spock relaxes into the mental union which is something like home and something like discovering an enormous library full of books he has not read." Ahhh, good. The Spock POV was especially, and sort of unexpectedly compelling.

In which Spock is new at school and Kirk takes him under his wing. THIS OMG HAHA. Tagged as "trek-dregrassi bastard lovechild." Doesn't that make you want to read it and laugh and then love it forever? Dying of cute and lolz.

In which Jim gets snatched by a sentient planet recreating Eden, and after being Adam it is a slow walk back to being Jim, but Spock is with him every step of the way. Oh my God, Eden planet that kills people, I could die that concept is so amazing. Also, Jim having a natural aptitude for dealing with sentient planets afterward, oh mannnnnn. This fic was very bittersweet, but it was bittersweet like caramel--it went down smooth. A+

In which Amanda and Winona were friends in high school, and Spock comes to stay with Kirk for a few weeks in his teenage years, and of course the only thing on Kirk's mind is how to seduce the new kid. This, haha, was cute and kind of amazing, but the end was just like, really? Really? Maybe it was just the last line though. Seriously, other than that, this fic was awesome.

D'awwwwwwww.

In which Kirk gets slapped with the Kel-Toth when he and Spock get together, and Kirk kind of makes it his mission to play things as close to the line as humanly (Vulcanly? XD) possible. Mmmmm, delicious fandom meta wrapped up in some pretty great sex scenes.

Reboot Star Trek, making hate sex possible for the most truelovedestinyshit pairing ever. Also, like I could resist anything with a Florence + The Machines song, HONESTLY.

D'awww, human-style and Vulcan-style.

Spock falls into a trap! lol

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA--deap breath--HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHA. "Is Spock in Pon Farr? -> YES -> Redirect harasser's attentions accordingly." This was a thing of beauty.

In which T'Pring had a son that she claimed was Spock's, so he gets the call when the kid's orphaned, and through a series of fortunate events, Kirk signs on as co-parent. In progress review: AHHH I HAVEN'T FINISHED THIS, BUT IT'S SO AWESOME SO FAR THAT I WANT TO MAKE THIS BOOKMARK PUBLIC ASAP. IT'S SO AWESOME I'M GONNA SAY IT'S SO AWESOME A FOURTH TIME. IT'S SOOOO AWESOME. Hilarious, hilarious snark, I am DYING. Also, me and my weakness for kid!fic. Also, I appreciate that their relationship is taking it's dear sweet time to be realized out of their already very satisfying friendship. Man, I will restrain myself from stating it a fifth time, but REALLY. The scene with Captain Pike in part 4, I mean, seriously, lmfao. And I'm sure there will be more of those moments. Finished review: AND INDEED THERE WAS MORE. All of that and mooooore. Man, the snark and the love in this fic, they are equal and equally amazing. Instant personal classic. Man, what is it with me and the kid!fic...

In which Spock hires a hooker to teach him about human intimacy before he arrives on Earth. Interesting. Spock's intellectual curiosity combines well with Jim's good-humor to create something at once fascinatingly anthropological and sweetly personal.

CUTEST STORY EVER, INDEED. FIVE YEAR OLD SHIPPER. YES. "Kirk loves Spock, and that is a fact, and it's not gross, so shut up."

In which Spock gets kind of obsessed with a ring Kirk is wearing for negotiations.

In which Winona Kirk's uniquely bitter and haunted perspective offers a reason why reboot!Kirk's eyes are blue and not brown like TOS!Kirk's. Also, she's a horrible mother and Kirk is better than them all. >:(((((

In which something is wrong with Kirk and Spock is determined to help, but perhaps the fic is more related to the surprising ways that fate and will clash and harmonize. Sometimes, I was confused by or unsatisfied with the chronological jumping, but overall this fic was so interesting and well-concieved that I forgave it. Also, guhhh, the telepathy in part 4 hit my kink buttons SO HARD. Parts of it may have gone over my head, but I'm accepting that as an excuse for later rereads. I look forward to it.

In which Jim needs to be careful about eating properly during his recuperation after a mission-gone-wrong, so Spock volunteers to babysit him during meals. This fic is cute and funny for the first three-fourths and then the last part suddenly blossoms into something honestly, utterly lovely. Oh, Spock. I may learn to love you yet.

In which both Uhuras don't quite get what they deserve, but they find ways to be content.

In which they're musicians--Spock, the closeted, kind of anal first chair violin, and Kirk, the free-wheeling, genius trumpet player--and they run about being musical and adorable. This could be more directed, but for a kink meme prompt it's satisfyingly weighty.

In which there are five times Kirk surprises people with his intelligence and one time he can't believe he was so dumb. Moohaha, as much as I love making-an-idiot-of-himself!Kirk, I think I prefer it when he is kicking ass and taking names in the most surprising ways possible. See this fic for a series of perfect examples.

In which they're stranded alone when Pon Farr hits, and Jim is not about to let this opportunity to bond with his long time crush slip through his fingers.

In which Spock is really, really annoying to Kirk, but you know, in an awesome and kind of endearing way.

In which Kirk and Spock come out to Spock!Prime. Hahaha, the end. "What's that?" Hahaha, Kirk, you'll see.

In which Kirk is obsessed with trying to get a sexual rise out of Spock, and that leads to its inevitable conclusion. Hahahaha. Once again loving a fic where Kirk is a total idiot for Spock.

In which Kirk thinks Spock secretly wants to let go, and he wants to be the one to make it happen. Gahhhhhh, hot.

In which Kirk struggles with the aftereffects of the mindmeld, and Spock struggles with the aftereffects of the destruction of Vulcan, and somehow this leads them both very specifically to the issue of Pon Farr. Woooooo, long interesting series.

Lolwut. In which Spock is not so great with idioms, much to the amusement of the rest of the crew.

In which Kirk is not pleased with an alien king looking at Spock like he's a beautiful specimen, and Spock doesn't quite understand why that is.

In which Uhura has some insights into their burgeoning relationship. The phrasing in this is awkward pretty much 90% of the time, but the idea is solid.

Bwahahahahaha.

In which Spock and Kirk, well, they have sex. Set almost immediately after the movie.